Naughty Play Food

At some point during this post you are going to decide either that this post is a prank born of a wild, filthy imagination, or that I should put down the crochet hook and back away, slowly.

I was inspired by this pattern and the incessant clattering of plastic food in the play kitchen to try my hand at crocheted play food. To understand what I’m talking about when I say “incessant clattering,” grab an empty trash bag and fill it with plastic cups. Now dump them on the floor. Do this 45 times an hour, and you’re with me.

Now, since this is an experiment and I unfortunately recently decided I didn’t have room to keep a “stash” that was not waiting for a specific project, off to the thrift store I went for whatever random yarn could be had for $.35 or less. I found a nice peach and a lemony yellow and thought, “I can work with that.”

So I began modifying the orange pattern to make a peach. I was having a great time. I made it to the part where you stuff your object with no trouble. Then I began to “close the deal,” so to speak and found myself with:

Well. If I’d photographed it with the yellow “stem hollow” I added on the rounded top side, you’d see why the mamas at the Joy Troupe Crafty Mamas afternoon were howling with laughter and joking that the children wouldn’t be allowed to touch their own toys. Nevertheless, I KNEW something could be made from this lovely peach yarn that looked edible so I had another go. (Can you identify where in this decision making process I keep going wrong? Thought so.)

This time I used the (yes. I did go there.) carrot pattern and got:

Now, I’m not above the occasional moment of naughty knitting. It’s fun. It’s silly. It’s harmless. But I swear to you, this is completely unintentional. So now we are brandishing my carrot in conjunction with my peach and, well…

Fortunately there was a subsequent Crafty Mamas event where I turned them into:



Now we have a respectable, if a bit blond, turnip and a parsnip, although Ian swears it’s a carrot. Or did before he grabbed the dangling yarn end and pulled. So we’ll be having another try on that. And, unlike what happened the day these items were born, there was no yelling.

Next I’m going to see if I can continue spinning straw into gold by having a go at corn on the cob… Stay Tuned.

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